EBTV presents host Evita Ochel with special guest Dan Mahle in a dialogue about challenges for modern men and the rise of wholehearted men.

Dan is a group facilitator, program coordinator, and occasional blogger on the topics of masculinity, vulnerability, and wholehearted living. His writing has been featured on various popular platforms, including The Good Men Project, Everyday Feminism, and YES! Magazine. Dan designs and hosts community gatherings, transformational group experiences, and leadership workshops in the Northwest.

General topics covered in the video include:

1) Dan shares his story of growing up as a young man in today’s world and how he came to do the work he is doing today. (1:40)

  • the role of vulnerability, fear and control
  • the importance of authentic expression

2) The challenge of porn addiction and sexual expression for men. (4:34)
Link to Dan’s article on pornography

  • pornography’s role in sabotaging healthy sexual expression
  • Dan shares about his personal addiction and how to understand addiction
  • Dan shares the benefits he experienced in his life after breaking the porn addiction

3) The connection of pornography to violence against women in everyday life. (11:50)

  • understanding the spectrum of violence perpetrated by porn for men and women
  • the hyper-sexualizing of women and loss of present being
  • subject-subject partnerships versus subject-object fantasies

4) How porn may impact the quality of men’s relationships with others and themselves. (16:38)

  • the importance of examining our stories and beliefs about ourselves
  • the paralyzing nature of shame
  • the importance of vulnerability

5) The importance of questioning cultural norms on our journey of understanding ourselves. (21:09)

  • the difference in life quality when we live from a place of integrity and self-worth
  • the importance of questioning the patriarchal system

6) What being a “wholehearted man” means. (24:15)

  • how to deal with shame
  • opening up to our innate capacity to love and be loved

7) How to bring out the wholehearted man. (26:50)

  • the importance of connecting with other men
  • the importance of mindfulness
  • the importance of confronting our deepest fears

8) Dan’s advice for the wholehearted development of teen boys and young men. (32:00)

  • facing the challenges of belonging
  • the difference of patriarchal masculinity

9) Dan’s closing words for living and being a wholehearted man. (37:25)