Comments on: Spirituality Meets Modern World: Dealing With Expectations

By: Evita Ochel

Evita Ochel — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 20:16:58 +0000

@ CHRIS – Hi Chris, thanks. I appreciate your view on this situation.

@ ZEENAT – Hi Zeenat, oh thank you so much for sharing your story! It is always so wonderful to learn with and from others experiences too I find.

I understand what you mean completely about choosing for the situation to turn negative or stay positive. I know this is indeed a choice. It is all about how we choose to act and speak. How we will react or act? All of these are within our control, whether we realize it or not.

It has indeed been a blessing Zeenat getting to know you too and I look forward to sharing more in 2010 :)

@ HANLIE – Always my pleasure Hanlie! Honestly Hanlie, being conscious of how and who we are at all times is the recipe I have found between a life of ups and downs, versus a life of stable joy!

@ WILMA – Hi Wilma, my pleasure.

And yes, you got it, it is that typical rushing into situations that ends us up often in unpleasant places. I know today in my life, that if we just stop and bring in a moment of stillness to act instead of react, than literally any situation can be turned into whatever we want it to be.

Thank you so much for your warm wishes Wilma and the holiday was excellent :)

By: Wilma Ham

Wilma Ham — Mon, 04 Jan 2010 05:09:37 +0000

Hi Evita
That has been quite a journey, literally and spiritually and thank you for sharing it so eloquently and so openly and so detailed.
Every step required an observation, an awareness and THAT is so unusual. Normally we rush in with our automatic responses, at least I do and those automatic responses coming from the ego are always about making trouble, judging and only seeing it one way.
Oh, I so loved how you dissected your responses to show us what was going on, it was like a mirror to me.
In the end spirituality and daily life are meant to come together and that is what you so beautifully showed here.
I too am sometimes miffed by what I can accept and when I have to ‘fight’ as part of doing my bit. Oh how unable I still am to discern who is speaking, my ego or my heart centered self, but I am learning and these accounts are very helpful.
Evita, you are a treasure and you certainly made this happen by being aware and conscious.
You have a wonderful holiday, you sure did the preparations.

By: Hanlie

Hanlie — Sun, 03 Jan 2010 21:16:28 +0000

Wow! I’ve come to the right place! I really learned a lot here. Thanks for being a shining light in my world, Evita. Being conscious is definitely high on my agenda for 2010.

By: Zeenat{Positive Provocations}

Zeenat{Positive Provocations} — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 05:20:15 +0000

Sweet Sweet Evita,
Youre such an awesome gal to share this enlightening story with us. I loved every bit of it. Especially the questions….??? My own personal fav(the one i usually jump to on my head) was~Was it for me to find my inner voice and practice standing up for what I believe is just?~ Well cause i am like that. I have that fighting for a cause itch in me which I have to tame quite often. {My dad always told me to be a lawyer ;)} Much like me telling myself stay calm stay calm…dont react negatively….if you cant say anything constructive, then dont say anything at all.
Just 2 days back I was in a similar situation….To my own amazement..and to the amazement of my hubby(who wont say it, but show it with his glances) I was calm. The situation…being stranded last minute while dropping my mom to the airport.I wont go into the details..but just imagine if that person who you spoke to about the bookings..if that was a very close friend….hmmm….
But i calmly quietly did exactly what was needed and didnt freak out.
I think when we react with our spirit we are more at ease with the situation…and rather than go with the flow of negativity …we actually can make the situation positive. But like you said..it IS OUR CHOICE!
Thank you Evita for this beautiful story from your life.
Happy New Year full of Love and Abundance and above all spiritual growth. I am so glad we connected in 2009…may this connection deepen int he years to come.
Lots of love
Zeenat.

By: Chris Edgar

Chris Edgar — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 04:14:17 +0000

Hi Evita — thanks, I really enjoyed this story — I think it illustrates that it’s possible to ask for what you want from someone else, even if it differs from what they may want, and to do it from a place of compassion for that person — as it sounds like you did with the travel agent. Wanting something to change, I think, is not necessarily greedy or “non-spiritual.”

By: Evita Ochel

Evita Ochel — Wed, 30 Dec 2009 20:36:03 +0000

@ STACEY – What a great example to share Stacey – thank you so much for taking the time to include your story! As I mentioned above, I love when we learn together and the more of us that share, the more we all benefit!

Indeed being inflexible and allowing to see past the situation can make life really unpleasant. We are one in all of this and at the end of the day, love and kindness go a very, very far way!

Thank you so much for the vacation wishes and all the best to you as well in the New Year!

By: Stacey Shipman

Stacey Shipman — Wed, 30 Dec 2009 13:52:18 +0000

This is a great lesson to share. Holding expectations can create great distress if we refuse to be flexible.

In 2008 I went on a writing/meditation retreat. I went alone and had a roommate that I didn’t know at the retreat center. Halfway through the week one of the employees came to my classroom and pulled me out. My roommate, he said, had bed bugs. I nearly died. I had to move rooms, give them all my clothing and items (including those clothes on my back!) to heat them to kill any potential bugs and they were keeping me with the same woman. The room they moved us to was not the same quality as the original room – no working lamps, much smaller, etc. I was not pleased. Remembering that I was on a meditation retreat (ha!) I approached the front desk and calmly explained how I felt and asked if there was another equitable room.

Unfortunately no. They did offer me a complimentary spa service and a thousand apologies. I was not pleased with the bed bugs, but I was pleased with how quickly they handled the situation. I think I remember writing a similar post to yours after that situation!

There is always something to learn.

Holding too tightly onto expectations can wreak havoc – it all stems from wanting to feel in control, and when expectations are not met, we lose that control to an extent.

I’m glad that in the end it all worked out and I know you will have a marvelous vacation!!! Happy new Year!

By: Evita Ochel

Evita Ochel — Wed, 30 Dec 2009 13:00:13 +0000

@ MEGAN – Thank you so much Megan. Yeah, I really like to see how pieces fit in. I don’t think anything in our lives is a coincidence, but everything fits in, in amazing ways – many perhaps that we cannot understand, but they should not be dismissed either way.

Thanks again for the energy imprint you left on this article – your enthusiasm is so much appreciated!

By: Megan "JoyGirl!" Bord

Megan "JoyGirl!" Bord — Wed, 30 Dec 2009 12:59:13 +0000

That is a tremendous story, and my gosh, Evita, I was applauding you in my head. Like you, I would have reflected in much the same way, asking myself what role I played in bringing that situation into my life. The same as you, I would have had my moments of stinkin’ thinkin’, but also been able to draw myself back from them and work from a more conscious state.
I absolutely loved reading this, and plan to share it far and wide. It’s a perfect example of what it means to walk our talk, and especially (I think) to have faith that an energy far greater than what our minds can conceive is at work… And it’s working ON OUR BEHALF!
Wow! Wow! and more Wow!

By: Evita Ochel

Evita Ochel — Tue, 29 Dec 2009 19:18:01 +0000

@ KARL – Hi Karl, thank you for sharing your insight. That is what I was wondering…what would people do, just walk away and let it be, or is there a way to take action in a spiritual and enlightened way? I am sure many would argue both ways. It is as Tess and you have said too, we have so many options!

Thank you also for the feedback about my writing – that means soooooo much and is always so appreciated!
And it was a pleasure to link to you, I loved your story and thought it was a perfect addition to this so people can also see how expectations work when it comes to personal goals – just an awesome fit!